COUNTRY TALK

WHOEVER GOES A BORROWING…

“Please tell me again what deal the Obasanjo presidency led by former finance minister Okonjo Iweala reach with the World Bank and other global financiers in 2006 or so?”
“I think in summary, it involved a cancellation of our debts after the country paid an agreed sum of eighteen billion dollars or so!”
“So in other words, we were to be given a clean slate”
“Yes”
“No more debt servicing payments”
“Yes”
“And did we actually make that part payment?”
“Yes we did-it was even reported in the papers”
“Then why is the present administration saying the country is currently indebted to the tune of some trillions of naira-I think four or so.”
“Hmmn beats me”
“And it is currently planning to borrow some more money from the World Bank, in partnership with some state governments to fund certain ‘developmental’ projects”
“It is a case of seeing less as one inquires more”
“So what’s being done with all our oil money?”
“Don’t you get it; it is used to wash away the stain from oil-soiled hands”
“Definitely not the hands of the great numbers of Nigerians”
“The projects you talked about-will the money be expended on them?”
“Or on bullet-proof cars?”
“Or on the emoluments of public officials?”
“Or on preparations for the upcoming elections?”
“Which ever way we look at it, we maybe in for another round of official posturing on why our national earnings are depleting due to our financial obligations to our creditors”
“I have a bright idea!”
“What is it?”
“What is the population of Nigeria?”
“A conservative estimate puts it at a hundred and thirty million people”
“Good! The government should obtain financial instruments of a million naira for each Nigerian”
“You must be out of your mind! Do you realize that that will amount to approximately a hundred and thirty trillion naira?”
“Look my friend, financial experts will work out the modalities but it could be done in phases; commencing with the employed or unemployed, adults or teenagers and so on.”
“You must be from outer space!”
“Please, see the possibilities-businesses will spring up, the demand and supply chain will be active and the economy will be rejuvenated”
“What you are proposing is a one way ticket to the land of GIGA inflation!”
“Well it should be duly considered! Still on this discussion, I’ll have to talk to the owner of Mama ‘Eat Good’ restaurant, down the street”
“Why?”
“To begin negotiations.”
“Negotiations over what?”
I happen to owe her a substantial amount of money over food and drinks I have consumed”
“And what are you proposing?”
“It is quite simple! For every four bottles of beer I have consumed, I pay for only one while she writes off the cost of all the plates of pepper soup I have taken!”
“What makes you think she will agree to this outrageous deal of yours?”
“Simple! If the debts of a whole country can be written- off, how much less those of a mere mortal like me?”
“You are not Nigeria and she is not the World Bank. Pay up your debts my friend!”
“It will work; I tell you it will work! Just wait and see!”