MATTERS OF LIFE ( Fiction)

El-hanook had retired for the night. And as he lay beside his pretty wife, Atisha, his mind vacillated between gazing at her as she slept and carrying out the task fate had chosen him for.

And for a very brief moment, he wanted so much to wake Atisha from her sleep; to tell her he loved her and their kids and that he was a member of the dreaded Habalani Sect that was responsible for the many bombings that had rocked Jabok City and that had kept the government of the day on edge.

To tell her that he was next in line, in becoming the medium through which more destruction, death, suffering and grief would come to many, including Atisha and their children.

Nevertheless, he couldn’t tell her because Atisha possessed amazing powers of persuasion and she would have pleaded with him to reconsider his decision and the fifteen years of marital bliss they shared. He pictured her, with tears in her eyes, asking him if making her a widow and their kids; fatherless, would sit well on his conscience. And El-hanook didn’t trust himself enough, not to cave in to these promptings.

He also couldn’t tell her because he had voluntarily joined the sect. That was after he had been sacked in a government agency because a superior viewed him as threat to his position. El-hanook’s appeal against the injustice had been quashed. Although he had secured another job, the experience had left El-hanook seething with rage. So much so, that he felt the Habalani Sect provided the medium by which he could vent the anger he felt.

And hadn’t he, some forty-eight hours earlier endured the  rite of the ‘Tukka’- a Habalani ritual when chosen suicide bombers are subjected to a hundred small blade cuts on their backs and bottoms, preparatory to their embarking on the mission, so that they are rid of all emotion, sentiment and pity.

And wasn’t he, thereafter, ushered into the ‘fortress’, the sacred meeting place of the Habalani, where he had audience with the sect`s Supreme leader, who had subsequently blessed him for his impending act of courage. In his time at the fortress, El-hanook had seen pictures of men who had paid the supreme sacrifice, in furthering the cause of the Habalani, as they hung on its walls. And if his mission proved `successful`, then someone else would see his portrait hung up as well!

As he adjusted his position beside his wife, El-hanook moaned softly from the pains coursing through his back. Ignoring them, he focused his attention on his wife again and then thought of his children fast asleep in their room. Once again, the pretty face of Atisha came into view and as he kissed her forehead, she responded with a sleepy smile and snuggled up closer to him. He drew in the smell of her hair and realised that this could be the very last time he would hold her, make love to her, and call her his wife.

The last time his children would ever call him father!

In an instant, El-hanook`s mind reverted to his assignment of doom. Earlier that evening, he dropped by the Habalani Headquarters for last minute preparations and briefings. He had inspected the vehicle he would be driving; its body already laced with high detonation explosives, rigged expertly to its engine, concealed beyond detection. He also examined the inner vest he would be wearing, with a number of military grade C4 bombs attached to it. He had also gone over the layout of the target location; a large shopping mall that attracted large numbers of people daily.

All he had to do was subsumed in a two-pronged attack: first he would drive the car and park it in the mall’s car lot. Then as he made his way to the entrance of the mall’s central lobby; he would remotely trigger the car to explode. In the ensuing melee and with the mall’s security crew distracted, he would head straight up to the most populated section of the mall and press the other trigger that would send him and countless others to their deaths.

Suddenly, Atisha called out his name from her sleep and El-hanook snuggled up to her in bed and at that moment he began to wonder……..

Somehow, as if sensing El-hanook’s hesitation, the voice of the Supreme Leader disrupted his thoughts: ``El-hanook, you must count yourself privileged to have been chosen to carry out this most sacred task. Remember that your name will be immortalised forever. It is imperative you eat adequately and get a good night`s rest. Only an alert mind and a healthy body can deliver the results we all desire.`` the Supreme Leader had eulogised at the fortress.

El-hanook finally decided to sleep but he knew he had a few things to do before taking his place in destiny. In the morning, he would tell Atisha and the children to stay at home because he wanted to give them a surprise treat. He would scribble a letter to them as well, revealing all and giving reasons for actions taken and have a friend from the sect mail it to his home. The stash of cash at home and at the bank would hopefully keep them running for a good number of years. He only hoped the letter would say enough to prevent his dying a second time; howbeit in their hearts. 

He also realised that he would do and be a lot of things  to so many others unknown to him, when the morrow comes, even as he succumbed to the lure of a burdened night`s rest.